As far as my ratings go, don't think that I don't like this piece. I'm a ground up rather, not top down.

Okay. Begin with the beginning. I didn't know what to expect after seeing the title, and then the first image came: "He asked me how I carry the light / so I showed him my hands." Wow. I was scared at first when the opening line held an abstraction, but it's grounded immediately. I feel a very earth/farm theme in the words, and that paints a beautiful picture of work and wood and dirt and life, and that's only after reading the first stanza.

The shape of the second stanza builds the content for me. It feels as though something is being drawn out at the furthest point with "lies" and then is released, nudging the reader to read the following lines faster, like plucking at a scrunchie on the wrist. The image of holes in the hands as a metaphor, in this case, for honesty is very strong, and it's an entertaining metaphor to lean on this early in the piece.

In the third stanza, I would change the wording a bit. Adverbs like "mostly" often take away from the power of a statement, and this statement could really hold some power. Leaving this part by itself, however, is an incredibly strong choice that draws the reader's attention to the words in a way that could not be accomplished in a larger stanza.

It's with the fourth stanza that one major opportunity for improvement becomes apparent, and that is the verb tense. Using the present tense instead of the past tense throughout the poem (except for the last line of this stanza) forces the action into the present. The scene becomes a story that is building around us instead of something relayed.

All I would do for the fifth stanza is change around the phrasing in the second line (from "the sun" to "suns") and remove the word "And" in the third.

In the last stanza, it is my humble opinion that an onomatopoeia ought be present for the proceedings. "Hit" doesn't give me the feeling I'm looking for in this piece. Also, I would change the word "love" to something less smushy.

Overall, I really enjoy this piece. I think that the ideas are there and the execution is almost there. It's a beautiful, warm set of ideas that I think are simple and grounded enough that the liberties taken with the abstract images and metaphors feel accessible.

Thank you for sharing such an entertaining poem!